Contemplating you.

Because you've tortured me. Tormented my very soul and shook my principles to the core. Cut through my psyche like an acetylene torch through a Aleoca frame. And yet you appear innocuous, seemingly oblivious to how you've disassembled my mental world like a wheel being de-spoked. Slowly, surely, becoming an empty shell. This post is for you. Just to inform. That you've succeeded beyond your wildest dreams or hopes. That my mind lies in tatters; my very existence an empty shell. I coast bewilderedly along the unpaved dirt road of life, cranking only when my plummeting velocity threatens to destroy my equilibrium entirely. Knowing that my cleats are fouled, that I can't unclip till I find a support to lean against. Yet, what little havens there were, you destroyed. You tailed me down the treacherous drops, before nudging me into the filthiest ditch you could seek. Only sheer skill and mucle memory has brought me this far. I'm on autopilot. My wheelset creaks; my spokes are a forlorn mess, sagging and twisted, torquing the wheel to nearly unrideable dimensions. My seatpost sways and buckles. My frame shudders and shimmies, and I don't even know why. The worst thing is that I don't even understand what you gain from this. Maybe only you alone know the truth.

But, if you plumb deep within your soul, if you conclude that your depraved actions were but an act of untold folly, of delusion and madness, if you decide to actually care, then know this. Know that in these days the path I ride runs along the borders of the humane mind. Know that I teeter on the fault line of reality. Know that somewhere in the wilderness of my mind, there's a figure, his jersey ripped, his helmet fissured, his gloves bearing the scars of numerous suicide skids; his spokes, corroded, snapping off one by one, wheels buckling slowly but surely; you realize from that weary grip on the bars that only raw skill and experience has guided him through the long miles behind. Yet the whitening of the knuckles forewarns that skill is not forever; that without a place of respite, a haven where he may recuperate, lick wounds both mechanical and organic, and rebuild his consciousness for the arduous journey to come, he won't make it. Fatigue triumphs in the end; the torso slumps, the chain slackens, and the clatter of the cranks echoes the wrenching death knell of the creased frame alloy. But for now, the figure rides on, clinging to the last vestiges of hope. Intervention on your part is still possible. But the end isn't far away.

~Ride fast, Ride Safe.~

Overhaul and maintenance.

Recently, Iwas doing prelim maintenance on my ride. Meaning that I clean the chain, wipe off fouling from the cassette, and lube the whole thing. Polishing the frame and derailleurs. Lubing the gear mechs. Checking for spoke fatigue. All the greasy but neccessary crap. It just made me think...what's my bike to me? I've come pretty far from being that snot-nosed kid who thought that singlespeeds were cool 'cos you could pedal like a maniac on them. Back then, my mech was nothing more than a more dangerous toy, an alternative form of entertainment. Lately, I've realized this isn't the case. My buddies tell me that on the pedals, I'm a whole different person. I prefer to think that the bike infuses its personality into me. Being on it just opens up my world; introduces new dimensions. All the crazy skids, switchblades, jumps I pull off...it's just not who I usually am. Yet I've been there, done that. Sure, there's been a wipeout or two here and there 'cos I didn't pay attention to what I was doing. Yet I'm not haunted by these failings. I consistently bite off more than I can chew, yet I routinely survive those sticky situations. I've never been forced to endure the humiliation of doing a flip over my own handlebars and being run over by my bike, something touted as a coming-of-age ritual for most mountain bikers. Why? I realize my bike is no longer a metal mech. It's become, in many ways, a part of me; in fact, it's a neccessary extension of myself. I'm told not many cyclists have the chance to feel this way. I guess I'm rather lucky. Or, to be narcissistic, I could say it's natural talent. It means the same thing to me.

~Ride fast, ride safe.~

Cyclists' Apocrypha

In the beginning God created the bicycle, saw that it was good, then went for a nice Sunday ride on the bike lanes He'd made the day before, and they were good, too, because they were new and He had the angels keep them clear of debris. Later, of course, God would get cross and have the flood wash all the good ones away.

And God said to Himself, Let us create man, because cycling is too much fun to keep to Myself, and so He created man, him did He create, create did He him do. And God put man in paradise, and commanded him, Glideth upon the earth anywhere thou wisheth, except for that big hill over there. For on the day thou goeth down that hill, thou shalt surely die.

And God said, Man needs a companion to keep him from spending too much money on new bicycles. So God caused man to fall into a deep sleep by asking him if he wanted to go clothes shopping at the mall, then took a rib from him. Then God said to Himself, Who am I kidding, I'll never hear the end of it when she finds out she was just a rib, so He created woman from frankincense and myrrh and a certain je ne sais quoi.

And God said, Let man have dominion over lathe drills and Philips head screwdrivers, and let woman have dominion over everything else, and as long as thou art naked and unashamed, thou might as well be fruitful and multiply.

Lastly, God created the chicken and the egg, in that order, which should clear up that matter.

Now the serpent, he was a wily one, and he said to woman, Yea, hath God said you may cycle anywhere but down that hill? And the woman said unto the serpent, That's about the size of it: go downhill and die. And the serpent said, Ye shall not surely die, you probably won't even fall off. For God doth know that on the day you go downhill, you will not need to pedal for a long time. Go on, give it a try.

And the woman saw that the hill was good, she did not need to pedal for a long time. She told the man about it, and he also went downhill. Their eyes were opened, they saw they were naked, and they sewed fig leaves into padded cycling shorts because sometimes it got bumpy going downhill.

And they heard the voice of God as He was offroad, fully suspended of course, and they hid their bicycles at the bottom of the hill and started whistling nervously. And God called unto the man, and said, Where art thou? And the man said, We art down here. And God said, Hast thou cycled downhill, whereoff I commanded thee that thou shouldest not? And man said, It was her idea.

And God said unto the woman, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow whilst climbing hills; in pain shalt thou perch upon thy saddle.

And God said unto the man, Because thou hast harkened unto the voice of thy wife, cursed is regular bike maintenance. The inner workings of the hub gear will be beyond thou to repair. In the sweat of thy face shalt thou service thy freewheel.

And God said, Behold, the man doesn't listen very well, so he kicked him out of paradise and guarded the entrance with a sign of a picture of a bicycle in the middle of a red circle. And He had a Cherubim with a flaming sword stop by a few times a week for good measure.

This is the book of the generations. The first bicycle was a single speed, Godspeed, but after that it got complicated. Sprockets begat sprockets and cables begat kinks. Celerifere begat Draisienne begat Macmillan begat Michaux begat Ariel begat Bayliss Thomas begat Lawson begat Rover begat Boneshaker begat Ordinary begat Raleigh.

And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth in a critical mass, God saw that the wickedness of man was great and he did not like to give way to anyone on the road even his mother, so He directed Noah to build an ark made out of renewable resources. There went in two and two unto Noah into the ark every type of bicycle: one to ride and one for spare parts. And Noah gathered two touring bikes and two mountain bikes; two recumbents and two tandems; two road racing bikes and two cross bikes; also four unicycles, just in case there was a misunderstanding, and a brace of Bromptons, as their folded countenance pleasethed Him. And God said there might be Some strong winds in the Southeast. And it rained for 40 days and 40 nights, then drizzled for another fortnight.

And God remembered Noah and asswaged the waters, and Noah opened a door on the ark and set loose Japheth on a unicycle, and God said This is a covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature: that a man on a unicycle is a hilarious sight. The waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh.

A bit later, God spake unto Moses, saying, Here are a few ground rules, I hath numbered them for thou for easy reference:

I. Thou shalt hold no other races above the Tour de France.
II. Thou shalt not make unto thee helmets which cost more than £100.
III. Thou shalt not take My name in vain everytime thou gettest a flat tyre.
IV. Remember to oil thy chain, to keep it rolling.
V. Honour the Zebra Crossing and those walking upon the face of it.
VI. Thou shalt not ignore other road users, nor cycle recklessly upon the pavement.
VII. Thou shalt not steal bicycles.
VIII. Thou shalt not kill, except bicycle thieves.
IX. Thou shalt not hang onto moving cars.
X. Thou shalt not covet they neighbour's new Cannondale, nor his groupset, nor his £3000 mtb, nor even his stylish shades.

Forget not the Titanium Rule: Signal unto others as thou wouldst have others signal unto thou.

And moving right along, there came four horsemen of the Apocalypse, and they were the Taxicab Driver, and the Motorcycle Messenger, and the White Van Man, and the Man Opening a Car Door Without Looking.

Amen

Servicing 201

Brought my ride down to Hup Leong today for Gilbert to service it. That guy knows how to squeeze the cash out, all right. He put my bike on the stand, cranked the pedals a few times and wrote down a list of what needed changing. The damn thing was 2 pages long. The best part was the tyres. He took a look at my beloved Panaracer Trailblasters 210 and went like, "The sidewalls are cracked. Replace them. I'll replace with another set of knobby tyres, multipurpose use, ok?" I started thinking, which no-life company makes multi-purpose tyres nowadays...
It only hit me when he showed me the tyres. Cheap Maxxis ones with an all-black surface and the all-too-regular knob tread. I remember them all too well....unfortunately. In fact, among the East end bikers, they aren't called multi-purpose tyres...they're known as 'no-purpose tyres'. Damn things can't corner, can't grip slick rock surfaces like granite, and can't even accelerate. Riding on them is akin to riding an urban single-speed bike---they're as slow as molasses. I guess the proprietor cottoned on to my thinking fast---perhaps his customers aren't all that retarded. He asked me what other brands I had in mind. I asked him for the Panaracer Trailblasters...and he promptly discovered they were out of stock. So I settled for their new Firebird XC series , which possesses supposedly unrivaled acceleration among off-road tyres. Then I added a cyclocomputer, which cost another 35 bucks. Total cost for servicing and replacement? SGD$201. New parts inclusive? SGD$236. A pretty good deal when you consider the improved performance. And the new tyres should be interesting...

Bike specifications and mods. Future mods?

This is in response to popular demand from some of my biking associates. Btw, on a more informal note, HRP is OVER!!!! All the hard work, unrelenting effort and sacrifice has culminated in a pretty satisfying product....I'm still overwhelmed by the sheer relief of it all. Will blog about it sometime else though. And now...the technical part.

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Original specifications: Stock mountain bike with basic knobbled tyres, standard Shimano gear set on Crestone aluminium frame. Stock straight-bar handlebars with standard gear shifter [knobs]. Standard suspension-mounted synthetic plastic seat. Front wheel suspension.

Modifications:

Aftermarket Trailblaster 160 tyres to replace stock tyres.

Aftermarket handlebars with wide steering and vulcanized rubber grip shifts [grip shifts pwnzorzz if you can master them haha]

Metal holder for water container on lower bar

Leather narrow-bodied bike seat with elongated stand

Results: The Trailblaster tyres are definitely the most significant modification. The enhanced grip squares to the side let you corner like never before. They provide superior grip in conditions that would defeat most standard knobbled tyres and the aluminium rims provide an economical yet reliable solution for getting both weight reduction and strength. Whee! Meanwhile, the grip shifts allow for smoother transition in switching gears in a tight spot. The forward twisting action in infinitely more natural than trying to twiddle some lever on a steep slope. Plus you can change 5 gears on a grip shift in the time needed to change one gear on a lever-operated shift! How pwnage is that.....as for the bike seat, what can I say? The higher you sit, the more powerful your pedaling stroke. That's as long as your feet can touch the pedals though.

a line in the sand

Get this clear. I've got my starting line. My turf. You want to enter it? Challenge me for it. Don't swagger in and expect me to kneel down and hand you the ownership rights. And if you're not up to the task, get lost. Don't curse your bike and whine about bad luck. 'Cos in biking, there ain't no such thing as luck. Your expensive bike isn't gonna get you anywhere either. Because mountain biking isn't about the machine. It's about skill, the ability of the individual. Get real, and piss off, asshole. There isn't gonna be a second chance.

Mountain biking...is it time?

I've been rethinking my biking career in the time I've been laying off competitive biking. Although the East Coast scene is still pretty lively and occasionally challenging, I've realized one thing over the time in my biking career. The very first form of REAL biking I was exposed to was mountain biking-----literally thrown in at the deep end by my uncle on the Bukit Timah track. And since that very day, it's been the X-factor in my burning passion for biking. Even after all that time doing asphalt racing on the ECP circuit, it seems things aren't gonna change. I'm only satisfied nowadays when I'm able to cut corners when going off-road or charge up a hill faster than my adversaries. And when I was told that the first SLC briefing in June would be on a Saturday, I almost lost the plot. Why? Because it clashed with my pre-arranged trip to the Bukit Timah trail. At one point of time, I thought, what the heck, I'll just cart my bike there, take attendance, and skip the whole thing. Who wants to play lame icebreakers anyways. Which just goes to say.....something. In fact, I was only saved from lunacy by my mum who gave me a verbal bashing and compounded my bike. So, all factors considered, am I really following my true calling? Even though I'm enjoying considerable success on the ECP circuit, is it really for me? Am I just in it for the convenience and success? Perhaps it's time to consider a return to the dirt track. Hmmmm.

Withdrawal.

The EastCorezBikerz team was never really hot when it came to membership availability. Now we're feeling the heat. While I'm supposedly injured and on hiatus from competitive biking, I figured my buddy [and the only other member] would still be able to tear it up on the ECP circuit every week. Great news. The smartass went and got himself mixed up in a 5-way biking accident. Apparently he was maxing out his bike speed AND trying to squeeze in between 2 slowpokes who were hogging the lane when another biker decided to try the exact same thing. Problem was, this individual of superior judgement happened to be going in the opposite direction. End result? Major abrasion to the knee, possible ligament damage and chest pain. Conclusion? EastCorezBikerz is officially disappearing from the competitive scene for a while. Well, what can I say. You gotta take a break sometimes. I just didn't realize it would be a compulsory one.

X-country contemplated.

I took some time off biking today to allow the knee some rest. According to some of my buddies, I shouldnt even be on my bike; should actually be wearing a leg brace and a crutch. However, limping around on foot isn't exactly my cup of tea, so I'll pass. Was just going over some schematics of the Bukit Timah bike trail again in preparation for my next trip there, and just happened to get this nostalgic impulse. Reliving the days on the dirt trail, the endless tumbles, the mudbath I landed in, the countless setbacks and the help rendered by the old-timers there then. I recall that back when I was still a kid, my only goal was to reach the end of the damn path so I could turn around and go home. But now, it seems, priorities have to change. What is X-country biking really about anyway? Is it speed? Power? It can't be.....that's for road biking. Looking up at a 70 degrees slope that resembles quicksand after torrential rain really takes the notion of speed out of your mind. You've got to know every cranny, every rock, every fissure of that hill in order to coax your bike up without taking a nasty tumble and a nice long slide to square one. And nowadays, I find my mind is no longer set on the final stretch of the trail; instead, I tend to compartmentalize the course, assessing individual obstacles and surmounting them one at a time instead of trying to mentally conquer them all at once. And when things screw up, or you realize your assumptions were screwed and something goes badly wrong, no raw speed or power is gonna help you. It's a simple matter of possessing the right skills and a calm head so as to be ultimately able to pedal your way out of every situation. It seems that after all those years, I've finally achieved this level of biker's psyche. A gratifying prospect.

Busted. Again.

I realize it's gonna be R & R for me as far as competitive biking is concerned....the damn knee hurts so I can barely walk straight now. My old thigh injury aggravated too....the Bt. Timah track will have to wait I guess. Am contemplating the idea of bringing in my bike for maintenance again....judging from the circuit run done just now, it sounds like there's a substantial amount of sand from the last recce trip fouling the gears. Upon closer observation, I realised that the chain needs to be regreased. How dumb is that?

Btw, for mosta you who dont know, this happens to be a revived blog. It died, what, 2 years back? Whee. Exhumation is fun.....